Turning Mogadishu into a Safe Quiet Suburb

Somalian Suburbanites

I recently came across a YouTube video that showed a CNN or some other similar news agency correspondent, showing how easy it was to buy guns in a Mogadishu gun market. He was trying to make a point about having easy access to guns. During the video he talks about how the NRA has it wrong, that guns cause fear and instability. That if you took all the guns away from the Somalians, all violence would cease and they would return to being productive citizens. 

I watched the video, and I knew, with all of my heart, that if we could just get those firearms out of the hands of those nomadic, warring tribesmen, who are now cooped up in cities without any kind of jobs or economy, we could get them started on their journey towards pacification.

An easy fix.

I put out of my mind the fact that in this population of almost 100% armed male adults, there was already an amazingly low number of actual gun crimes. There were hundreds of deaths dues to the ongoing war and tribal feuds, but not a lot of robberies, murders or accidental shootings. Folks just do not make it a habit of trying to rob other folks who they are absolutely guaranteed are armed

That being said, and just as quickly ignored, I am sure that just somehow confiscating the hundreds of thousands of rifles, we can pacify and calm the population and get them involved in the real day to day function of world government and taxes.

They can trade in their rifles for landscaping equipment and garage door openers, chain link fences, automatic coffee makers and cable TV, etc. And become productive, relaxed suburbanites.

However, just as my itchy fingers were about to close around the barrels of those hundreds of thousands of evil firearms, I recalled similar events which had occurred just a few years ago and on this same continent.

It seems that the inhabitants of Rwanda had decided to become embroiled in a genocidal civil war in which over 500,000 Rwandans had been killed.And the most revealing thing about this was that the Rwandans had almost no firearms, but these enterprising Africans did not let this stop them.

It seems that almost every Rwandan had a machete, an axe, a hoe and were more than willing to use those machetes and axes and hoes to chop up and kill their fellow tribesman. And in the cases where no machete or axes or hoes were readily available, they used shovels, pickaxes, tire irons, kitchen knives, screwdrivers, chainsaws, burning tires, rocks etc.

And when none of these implements were available they were only too ready to use their bare hands to strangle or beat the victims to death.

Let me say that this easily dispels the myth of “lazy Africans” perpetuated by Belgian colonial forces. To kill 500,000 of your fellow countrymen in such a short time period, without using firearms, you need to work very hard every day. You have to keep on a schedule and treat this as a real job.

This certainly puts a new light on things. Now I have a slight worry that simply confiscating firearms might not solve the problem, but I am sure I can easily just be persuaded to be in denial of that and continue on with this plan.

PS- The person narrating the YouTube video is supposed to be an ex Navy SEAL.

No problem there except when they come to one of the AK-stands in the Bakaara arms market, one of the zany characters who has been following them around picks up an empty RPG launcher and points it at the SEAL who then quickly ducks out of the line of sight of the barrel (which you can see daylight through, thereby kind of insuring it is indeed an empty RPG), saying "hey, watch it, careful!", and when the goober pointing the RPG sees this he get tickled, starts giggling like a school girl and points it at the cameraman who also tries to hide and cower from the empty launcher. Ducking and shrinking in fear.

This produces even more attempts by the goober at scaring the crew, pointing the empty launcher tube, watching them duck and scamper, and continuing to giggle like a drunken monkey, (no racial slur intended). Soon, even the crowd begins to laugh and point at the silly scared Americans.

You see, even the backwards, uneducated Somalians know when an RPG launcher is empty and presents no threat to anyone. Even the women and children know this, everyone knows this, except the scared Americans.

So it is with no surprise that soon the crowd begins to think they should perhaps capture and beat these silly Americans, maybe even kill them, why should they be worried about killing some silly scared Americans? They had done it before, and even dragged them through the streets naked afterward. Why should they have any respect for anyone who ducks and shows fear when someone points an empty launcher at them? That would be no different than someone getting scared at a plain wooden stick being pointed at them, and even I would have to lose some respect for someone who ducked down and cowered when I pointed a stick at them.

I think I might have played it a bit differently, especially if I had been a Navy SEAL like the guy narrating the video was supposed to be,(I was only a lowly Army Scout/LRRPRanger) I think I would have picked up an AK from the stand and with a kind of crazy grin on my face, racked the bolt, chambered a live round and pointed it at his head and waited to see if he would duck.

When he did, I would have laughed and pointed to him and then the crowd would have started laughing at him too. Then, I would have swept the crowd with the AK that had the bolt racked, safety off, a live round in he chamber and seen if they would duck too. When they did, I would have laughed and pointed at them."Ha-Ha-HA-Ho-Ho-Ho! you funny African people!, you make me laugh, hahaha!.."

The point I am trying to make, when in Africa, a continent filled with predators, here's a tip, try not to look like prey. The same goes for anywhere on the planet. Whether it is in Africa or in Chicago, or Houston or New Orleans. There are hunting preserves in every city in the world and if you happen to find yourself in one, while you do not necessarily have to look like a predator, do your best not to look like prey. -Scout

You can be guaranteed that these guys will hand in their weapons if asked by the government